I have dealt with a lot in my past, especially in the NASCAR area and I have just had it. I am sick of people telling me what to say, how to say it, what and how to do things, what to think, and what to feel. I am tired of everyone trying to run my life, tell me what's wrong with my life, what's wrong with me. Yes, I have issues, please stop pointing them out. Yes, I am a Kasey Kahne fan as well as a Bobby Labonte fan and if that bothers you, I don't care. Just stop picking on me for liking Kasey as well as Bobby. I realize many of think I just decided to be his fan last year, but to be perfectly honest, I have been a fan since he took Bill Elliott's ride in 2004. However, we couldn't afford, literally, for me to be a fan of both and I did pick Bobby over Kasey, but I never really stoped cheering for Kasey. For as long as I have watched NASCAR, people around me have made fun of me. They just never got it and I thought last year things were starting to turn around. I have been lucky enough to be able to help out JTGD with the chat log and I made so many Bobby fan friends, that I thought things couldn't get better. And then I went to the race in Chicago and I got to be picked on person again. It was fun in the beginning, I'll admit that, but it got out of hand. I still blame myself for the issue he had in the race, just so you know. And I have a bad feeling those stories probably haven't fully died and will come back to haunt me this year. I cannot handle it anymore. I have tried to be strong, but I am just not a strong person anymore. I don't know that I ever was. I've had lots of people tell me that I'm a good listener. That's great, but where is that person I can truly talk to. Every time I say something a little crazy, it gets blown out of proportion or I get tortured with little reminders of just how crazy I am for thinking the way that I do or for things I like or believe in. So even after gaining so many Bobby fan friends, whom I really thought would be able to handle things in a fairly calm and nice manner, because that's the kind of person Bobby is so I figure surely his fans will hold some of the same standards, I find out many of them cannot handle it well. So I don't know what's wrong with me, but I guess it will never truly matter. So when some of you wonder why I never say much it's because I don't want things to come back and bite me, because they always do. So when I said I was going to jump off a building, believe me I have been thinking about it for years now (or something to that effect). Most of the time I find other ways to deal with it, but I feel that one of these times, well...just don't say I didn't warn you.
Well it's been a little while since my last post. Since then, I had my 22nd birthday, which I now get to share with my niece. Her name is Evey Antoinette and she was born at 12:08 AM Jan 20, 2012; 7 lb 2 oz and 19 in long. She is so precious and she cries every time I hold her. I hope she gets used to me.